A funny email today

I get lots of jokes form my Uncle Bob, but I rarely forward them. Not because they aren't funny, but just because I hardly ever have time to read them. I store them in a jokes file and every once in a while when I need a laugh, they are there waiting for me. I clicked on this one for some reason, and laughed so hard I had to share it. I have been complaining to Pascual about ALL of these things.... Being the Insurance Man that he is, he tells me that they are going to have to write me off as a total loss, and maybe some mechanic will buy me cheap and part me out.



IF MY BODY WERE A CAR.... If my body were a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I've got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish, and my paint job is getting a little dull. But that's not the worst of it. My headlights are out of focus, and it's especially hard to see things up close.My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather. My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins. It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently. But here's the worst of it -- Almost every time I sneeze, cough or laugh, either my radiator leaks or my exhaust backfires. CASH FOR CLUNKERS..........I QUALIFY

Pizza Night

Homemade pizza last night, Kayleigh was the chef. We make it in a 2 1/2 pound loaf bread machine and it takes 1 hour till the dough is ready. If you don't have a bread machine, get one at a local thrift store or garage sale. We use ours all the time and make fabulous bread with it. It kneads and proofs the dough and gets it through the first rise, then you shape it, let it rise again and bake... very easy. Even I can do it, and I am not the bread baker Paskie is... I am the cookie, cake and pie lady.

Here is the recipe:

1 1/2 cups water

1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil

3 1/2 cups unbleached all purpose flour

1 tablespoon sugar

1 1/2 teaspoon salt

2 1/2 teaspoons bread yeast

1 tablespoon flax seed (optional)

Place all ingredients in bread machine pan according to the above order exactly. (wet ingredients always go first) Program the machine for the pizza cycle, and press start.

When the machine beeps at the end of the cycle, remove the bread pan from the machine and turn dough out on to lightly floured surface. Divide dough by cutting with a knife into desired number of portions. Roll out to desired thickness. Transfer to baking stone or cookie sheet, spread sauce, cheese and toppings. Bake at 425 degrees for 15-20 minutes or until pizza is desired golden brown doneness.

1 batch makes 3 pizzas as pictured, 18 inches wide with thick crust. I double it and make 4 large pizzas with my extra large cookie trays. We often make mini pizzas when the kids have friends over.

My favorite gourmet version is ranch salad dressing for the sauce with roasted garlic mixed in, fresh sliced mozzarella cheese, diced chicken breast browned in garlic, crispy crumbled bacon, chopped green onion, diced fresh tomatoes from the garden. It is delicious and it disappears fast. Some make it with Alfredo sauce, we tried both and you don't really notice the difference.

Give it a try. It will only cost you the price of the ingredients, which I guarantee will be less than half the cost of one pizza, and your kids will love making it.

Making Pizza

Mom and Teen came over for the weekend and I made Pizza with Adrianna and Breezy. I love the photos of them rolling out the dough. Breezie was really into it, and wanted to eat the dough and threw a fit when we took it away. I love spending time with the family. I forget what it's like to hve a 2 year old around... She is into everything. She calls me Auntie and Pascual is Tio or sometimes Tito, and she tells us over an over "I low-lu" which is Breezie language for I love you. It just melts your heart when she says it... Ahhh... almost makes me want more...